If only

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There is no end to what ifs...
I try not to go there in my mind.
It creates more questions than answers.
Leaves me with self doubt and often triggers fear.
No one knows the future.
Our past is not always a good guideline to reflect on.
Tonight I had panic.
I am not physically well
I had woke and was disoriented
I forgot all my tools for the anxiety...it was ramping quick...I reached out
Breathe....
I was going too fast
The brain was in full out panic
I found a podcast
It did not matter much the topic but was calming
I have medication if it goes too far
I did get myself refocused. Had some help from an online friend.
It never hurts to ask for help when in distress. Sometimes just a talk helps.
I still feel scattered
I am here

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