From Shitty to Fabulous

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I woke up feeling extremely groggy. I didn't sleep til 6 am. I am not positive but my phone activity is a telling sign that "someone" was up ALL night. ..again.
It seems to be a ritual. When I  sleep alone Wee has a fear from words told to her at 5 years old..." I am going to burn that house down...if anyone gets out I will shoot them"...I too have heard those words. It was seemingly a mantra for my father for years after my mother ran with us kids. (Love you for your bravery Mom!). It is stuck with Wee and she truly believes that he can still do that. (He died in 1999)
So, I have gathered the information that tells me that staying up to watch while the others at home slept, to watch for trouble from my dad, was something started many years ago. ..would explain needing to stay in and put my head on my desk at elementary school at recess.
By high-school another alter emerged. I  was 12. Sleep had been hit and miss until I moved back to home in 2011. Now Wee is watching again almost every night. Nothing seems to assuage her. And since she believes she is time travelling and 'she just saw him on the weekend ' she doesn't believe he has gone from this world.
I do know tired!
Anyway...back to the wake up. I was done. I just wanted to go back to bed and cry. And then it happened. Friendship. A friend says they are coming with lunch. Pizza. And so I throw some clothes on. No shower,  no makeup, bedhead hair up in a ratty bun. ...
Well the day just got better and better. Lunch and talk and laugh. Then got taken out for a cruise and did a few stops. Then.

Ice cream! !!!

I am so lucky to have great people in my life. They don't always understand. ..me neither. ..but they love me and listen and do whatever they can just for me to know. .KEEP GOING. For you D. 😆 I am so grateful for today. You made it Fabulous.

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